I'm not kidding. Here's the link.
No seriously, you should read it! It's so well thought out. He definitely took his time writing this:
"Imagine for example if you ate 7.2 percent of a hamburger and then realize that your stomach growling for more. Ultimately, it equals next to nothing in terms of filling you up."
This is coming from the guy who told his Eastern Echo staff to stop covering Eastern Michigan Athletics until Ron English was fired. Pretty selfish, right?