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A Girl Named Lou

A completely fictional account

Miami Redhawks at Eastern Michigan Eagles in Pictures

As the spring college sports season winds down, we writers are tasked with coming up with interesting stories to fill the gap. I decided to do a play on the Johnny Cash song, “A Boy Named Sue.” Some of you are familiar with the song, for the rest of you, it goes like this.

After listening to this tune, I got to thinking about an entirely fictional account of a MAC women’s basketball player. We’ll name her Lou.

In the song, the boy named Sue grew up without a dad. Dad named him Sue so he would grow up strong, with all the teasing and what not.

In our completely fictional account, our Lou is undersized. She has to shoot the ball from her hip, much like Pistol Pete. However, she has heart, and heart matters. We are not going to delve into her personal life, but her sports life. Coaches are kind of like dads. Or moms. Actually a combination of both. Unlike Sue, Lou has had three.

The first coach did a job and brought Lou to school. That parent was removed. A new parent came along, and did a wonderful job, bringing many wins. However, that parent decided to take a sideways move and left our hero. Now, Lou is on her third parent. Is this parent good, or bad, or somewhere in between?

We don’t know.

What we do know is that Lou is spunky, has heart, and is a fantastic basketball player. We have questions for this third parent. We want to know how they are going to take care of our beloved talent.